Numb.

I'm sick. I haven't used my tissue box until yesterday since I moved to my room. And I've forgotten how it feels like.

One person I know told me that when he's sick, he's more needy for attention and gets short-tempered. Well, who doesn't right?

This is the perfect time to feel like someone is there to take care of you, not even to stay up late when your body doesn't feel too good, but enough to make you feel like you were thought of, that at the very least, they did their best to stay up and be with you. And if they really couldn't, they'd sleep and not do anything else.

I've forgotten this feeling of numbness actually. This time on my bed, feeling drowsy and all gives me time to think, think of why people make petty lies, smallest, tiniest lies, why people make excuses, why people act the way they are, why people are so selfish, insensitive, proud, and so on. And then, I answer myself.

It's because I make them do so.

Who ever made me think this way?

At the time when my body is confused not knowing whether it's feeling cold or hot, drowsy or not, my mind is clear.

Timing is perfect. I'd gladly do the same for others.

-Nik